Before you begin reading this column I need to warn you that I will be sharing many of my religious beliefs. I am a Christian and those beliefs will be evident throughout this column. Therefore, if you are a non-believer, or a follower of a different faith, and you are offended by proselytizing, then you may want to stop reading now.
If you're still reading, then good for you. As believers we should feel so blessed to enjoy all the wonderful gifts God provides us everyday. In no particular order the things we should be most grateful for include our eternal salvation, the love for your fellow man, the infectious smile of a baby, the unconditional love from a dog, a really good deviled egg, a nicely broken-in recliner, a warm toilet seat, an ergonomically designed remote control, and of course, the snow day.
The snow day may be overlooked by many, but I can assure you that around my house there is no greater gift. Unfortunately there is quite a bit of stress that comes with the snow day. As much as it is a gift from God, there are some natural and man-made enemies to the snow day.
As I am married to a teacher I think I can offer some insight into the snow day that may be missed by those on the outside. The first thing students and teachers worry about on their snow day is whether they will get the next day off as well. While teachers are lying comfortably under their electric blankets watching "The View," they spring out of recliners like fierce jungle cats when they hear someone driving by their house.
"Stop driving around and melting all the ice and snow you idiot," is what you might hear them scream with their faces smashed against the window and fingernails scraping down the pane. Absolutely no sympathy for those not able to stay home from work.
Another enemy of the snow day is the salt and brine trucks. First, if God wanted salt to be used to melt snow he would have made it instead of man inventing it. High blood pressure, heart attacks, and clear roads: three things caused by salt that we can do without.
Of course the only natural way to melt snow and ice is Mr. Sun. For 350-360 days a year you'll get no complaints from teachers about Mr. Sun shining as brightly as he can. But for those other few days a year, you'll see teachers looking skyward and cringing every time he pokes his head through the clouds. Teachers actually wish away their day so the sun will go down and the melting and drying out process will stop for the day in the hopes of an additional snow day.
But alas, all good things must come to an end. I think we have probably seen our last snow day for this school year. And quite frankly, I'm ready for some warmer weather anyway. But they were sure fun while they lasted. I better soak up all the fun in this last snow day. Maybe I'll curl up with my wife and dogs and snack on deviled eggs while I change channels with my new remote and wait for my new toilet seat warmer to beep when it's ready! |
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