Having resided in these parts for almost three score years now, certain truths become evident.
One is the fatal attraction between Southerners and snow.
We don’t get much, don’t see much so we are obsessed by it.
Area television stations know this, and they do boom business with snow forecasts. Every station seems to have a Snow-something although Snowbird is easily the champion of snow mascots and the others should just give it up.
To folks coming from places where snow is common as rain, and likely replaces rain often in the winter, the electrifying effect of a snow pronouncement, even to its slight possibility, must seem weird, silly and funny.
Guilty on all counts.
But, snow is pretty darn rare here, especially in the past 10, maybe even 15 years.
I can’t remember the last decent, deep snowfall we’ve had. The last couple of years our incredibly mild winters have yielded maybe one snowfall barely worthy of note.
The missus, a teacher who keeps close track of such things, reminds me we missed one school day for snow last year and none the year before.
Everyone knows most of us don’t know how to drive in snow as evidenced by the fact we seem to divide into two groups on any motoring surface with snow and/or ice: those going 5 mph and those going 75 mph. We seem to be terrorized by snow on roads or just refuse to acknowledge it.
Thankfully, we have very few hills around the city so maintaining a certain momentum is not critical and most abandoned vehicles can just be pushed to the side.
Through the years I have studied the subject and decided it’s not that most folks around here can’t really drive in snow, not counting the tragically high percentage that can’t drive in summer sunshine, they just don’t want to.
So, they drive 60 mph on ice, knowing they are going to slide off the road, but lacking hills, not go tumbling into a giant snow bank and then awaken with Kathy Bates putting a 4x4 between their ankles while holding a sledge hammer.
That harrowing experience of sliding off into the shoulder on Broad Street allows folks to convince their boss they are scared to death of driving in such conditions, so they just can’t come to work and risk life and limb doing so.
A snow day is a delight for children so I can only imagine how neat it must be for an adult to get to miss work because of weather conditions.
Lots of us use a little snow to grab the opportunity to nest, kicking sports events, church functions, family get-togethers and social gatherings to the curb due to inclement weather in favor of wrapping up snuggly and ordering pizza and a movie off cable.
We can’t even cook if it snows because we might need that food for later if things really get bad.
Oh, the last time things really got bad was 1983 when six inches of ice actually necessitated keeping most of us at home.
Still, snow is a special event here, one I’m sure New York marketers, well, maybe Atlanta marketers, will figure out some ways to turn into a gift giving and/or drinking holiday.
In the meantime, here are a couple of observations from long observation:
• Snow almost never comes here when weather forecasters say it will. If it comes to the midstate, it usually passes to the north or south of Rutherford County, much as, thankfully, tornadoes do.
• If forecasters promise a lock for snow, don’t bother finding your scarves and gloves.
• Just because it didn’t snow at your house, doesn’t mean Smyrna, Kittrell, Milton or Eagleville didn’t get an inch or two.
Thursday night’s snow in about 30 minutes of flakes as big as pancakes covered the landscape and dropped 2 inches of snow and slush on roads between Thompson Lane and Smryna. By the time you got to Main Street, the streets were black.
Just remember, snow isn’t a weather phenomenon here; it’s an event. |
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