Late Saturday night in beautiful downtown Townsend, the Peaceful Side of the Smokies, the parking lot of the excellent Trailhead Restaurant following a delightful meal.
Key in ignition, turn.
Car: “INNNC. INNNC. INNNC.”
Pirtle: “POOP.”
Car trouble in a rural, fairly isolated community late Saturday night on a holiday weekend is not a pleasant development.
It kinda made me wish I had actually filled out and returned that AAA auto service contract sitting by my chair in the den.
But, wishes don’t start cars.
I sent the missus back into the restaurant to inquire as to possible assistance.
Meantime, I continued to jiggle the key and try to get the car to start.
Miracle of miracles, it kind of groaned and then fired.
Leaving the car running, I ran to get the missus who was hearing the restaurant owner explain his car had just recently experienced the same issue as the result of a dead battery. He suggested we drive back into Maryville, 18 miles, away and get a new battery at one of the big discount stores – unnamed in this column, but one I avoid at all costs.
Having had the vehicle serviced the day we left for the Smokies, I figured the battery was probably the problem and the drive to Maryville necessary.
So, we made an hour and a half adjustment to our evening schedule.
The next morning the car wouldn’t start again, so I prepared to replace it.
The tools in my vehicle were at best pitiful, basically a decent pair of pliers, couple of screwdrivers and a small ratchet set. The sockets to the latter were fine but the driver had a hollow plastic handle I figured couldn’t turn much.
I was right.
And, I learned that immediately after determining the battery in my six-year-old vehicle was the original, meaning it had provided great service but died at a bad time.
After struggling 15-20 minutes trying to move a soft-metal screw without destroying it or breaking the ratchet handle, I knew the chances of getting the battery connectors off the post were beyond my available means.
I sent the missus to the strangers next door in search of a hammer, socket set or any tool with a decent grip, or if nothing else maybe some WD40.
The nice lady there had only the latter.
Hopeful, I tried it.
Three minutes later the old battery was out, the new battery in and the car running.
What turned out to be a great weekend was saved.
Needless to say, a small can of WD40 will soon rest beside the roll of duct tape already in my car, joined by a couple of decent tools.
I’m not much of a mechanic and don’t plan to be.
But, you never know when life will toss a test at you.
That’s why duct tape has become legendary – it can fulfill so many needs, if only for a short while, so well. It’s not so great as a replacement for chrome, but it will seal a burst water hose, hold a broken wheel well and meet countless other unexpected developments that allow a traveler to get to a service station instead of waiting endlessly for a service truck.
WD40 makes a frozen lug nut let go, opens frozen doors and, as I learned, makes battery connectors slip off battery posts even if the locking nuts won’t move.
Hopefully, that’s my Be Prepared-Boy Scout moment for the year.
•••
While in the mountains the missus and I made our first foray onto an uncrowded Smokies hiking trail for the first time since our hike two years ago turned into a scary encounter with a momma bear and two cubs.
After never seeing a bear on a hiking trail in some 30 years of tromping around the Smokies, the missus dang near marched right over one on that excursion.
Fortunately, the missus handled the situation well and we escaped unscathed, albeit a bit adrenalined up with a decent story to tell.
Our latest hike took us on a trail were a bear had been spotted at times, but that first encounter I had alerted me to the strong, poignant smell of a bear.
So, I kept my eyes down and my nose up as we hiked uneventfully.
•••
So, last week we had a plan to add a big banner to our front page if Middle Tennessee knocked off Maryland.
Yeehaw, the Raiders were superb. We made the front-page switch and sent it to the printer.
Something happened and the switch didn’t go on the press.
Here’s hoping we had to change the front page for today’s edition.
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