I recently listened to “What Now,” a book on tape by author Ann Patchett.
The book was a graduation speech delivered to her alma mater, Sarah Lawrence College and chronicled her career from student to successful author with many side steps in between.
It’s been MANY years since my college graduation and I can no longer remember who spoke there or what it was about. I barely remember the graduation speeches for my children’s graduations, which weren’t that long ago.
But I do remember that for me, as for many college graduates, “commencement” wasn’t just the ending of one of my scholastic career: It was the beginning of a less-defined, uncharted, more uncertain path.
When I left school I had no job, college loans to repay, no room at home to move back into and no money. We didn’t have credit cards back then, so fortunately I eluded that debt.
But I still remember now how scary it was to face that big unknown world out there. And I don’t think it’s gotten any simpler.
As the mother of three young adults I have told many of my friends that the hardest time in my children’s lives have been those years just after they graduated from college.
Throwing oneself out to the world after college is wrought with anxiety and negative emotions, many of which stay around for a very long time.
After college, one feels qualified for a job that earns a six-figure income, when in fact a job as a server at a restaurant is the only available. Patchett worked as a server at TGI Friday’s in Nashville for four years while penning her first novel.
Instead of relating to friends like her, college grads compare themselves to friends who have found the “perfect” job while they are still working at their part-time jobs and facing repayment of college loans.
If they are lucky enough to find a job, they confront REAL work, which means showing up five to six days a week on time, not having quarterly breaks and long weekends and not having the financial backing of Mom and Dad (if they were lucky enough to have had it in the first place).
Several years ago on the Today Show Katie Couric interviewed 25-year-old authors of a book entitled “The Quarter Life Crisis.”
Katie essentially made fun of these girls after the interview, with a comment like: “Do these girls have an aunt in the publishing business or something?”
I thought, “Oh, Katie. You don’t have a clue.” If she had a child in that age range, she would have understood.
My daughter Anne, who worked for a large law firm in Atlanta out of college, said one day: “Mom, you know, the only thing worse than not having a job is having a job.”
It’s a statement we discuss frequently at our house.
Patchett asked: What’s Next?
There are no answers written in stone, but here are some tips for you 20-somethings struggling out there.
Try to find a job you will like, even if it’s not your “dream.” Show up on time and work hard (Woody Allen said that 80 percent of success was “showing up”).
Be a good employee and get along with your fellow workers. Be a good citizen. Vote and take out the garbage. Be the best spouse and mother or father you can be.
Learn your strengths and what interests you. It may be acting, it may be computing, it may be writing songs. Try to figure out how you can get a job in one of these fields and see if you like it.
You might not find it today or tomorrow. You might not find it ever.
But you can make the best with the hand you are dealt if you believe in yourself and always keep an open mind.
You WILL make it out of those uneasy times and you WILL be stronger because of them.
And take inspiration from the many successful people out there whose unconventional paths to success have proven that you can do it, too.
‘Til next week. |
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