Ol’ Hammerhaid’s feet are still aching after taking in the annual Sales Tax Holiday over at the Mall.
“Wow, there were more folks than the day before Christmas Eve,” he groaned. “But there was a big, big difference. It was 105 degrees, according to the TV weatherman,” H-haid explained.
“That heat brings out the meanness in some folks,” he added, neglecting the mention that he, Ol’ Hammerhaid, was probably the meanest of the lot.
And what makes him so mean?
Frankly. Hammerhaid is a little tight fisted. In other words, he’s cheap.
So, it looks like the Sales Tax Holiday would be the perfect event for the old tight wad?
Well yes...and no.
Don’t get me wrong. H-haid loves not paying sales tax, but he’s not so big on the huge crowds associated with the annual state holiday. And (secretly) he wonders if prices might rise slightly during the sales.
“Oh, I don’t think prices rise, I suspect some of the sales and specials disappear during that three-day weekend,” he explained.
But that wasn’t the deal at the Mall and other Boro shopping places with stores featuring markdowns in addition to being sales tax free. “Dang gum it,” he said.
He even got talked into buying some new clodhoppers. They were cheap with an additional mark down.
Hammerhaid is more than a bit peculiar when it comes to buying shoes. He prefers rough-cut leather that you don’t have to polish and lace-up instead of slip-ons.
“My foot just isn’t made for slip-on shoes, which never seem to fit me in the heel,” he explained.
Naturally, that doesn’t explain why his last pair of shoes was slip-ons. He’s worn them every day and every night for the last three years.
“I’ve worn them shoes as flat as a flitter. The soles are as thin as tissue paper,” he added.
Yep, he bought them as spares for some casual summer event and quickly had to add insoles to give them a bit of an arch. But they became his favorites because they were easy to slip on and off. They were off as much as they were on, but they weren’t much for endless walking.
Normally, if he planned on walking much Hammerhaid would don his “exercise” shoes, which is a pair of white gym shoes. Naturally, most of them are worn out too, but still much more comfortable than his “dress” shoes.
Unfortunately, out of habit, he slipped on his work shoes when he took his daughter out shopping on the Sales Tax Holiday.
“Oh, my aching feet!”
It was a complicated day of shopping. Betty Lou had to work, which was good news for Hammerhaid’s aching feet. Loading Betty Lou in the minivan with all the children and her mama can be an expensive proposition.
While the H-man has his own set of shopping habits, Betty Lou has an entirely different set.
Hammerhaid will at least try things on ... as much as he hates going into those tiny little dressing rooms that are so tight, he can barely take off his pants to try on a new pair.
Betty Lou, on the other hand, refuses to try anything on until she gets home.
Actually, this has a way of working out for Hammerhaid, ‘cause most everything she buys has to go back to the store.
Well anyway....
But the shopping continued .... and continued ... and continued.
Finally it was over.
The “load” of purchased items just consisted of Hammerhaid’s new shoes. Can you believe it?
T-t-t-t-that’s r-r-r-r-r-right. |
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